So I haven’t been skating a whole bunch, as Kev has moved out, and he’s the one I skated with mostly. Plus I’ve really been concentrating on getting a job. I have been working with Comet for a few weeks, on just some little things, but that sould be picking up soon…

I’m looking forward to it.

*modified from an email to K. Gardner*

This past Wednesday I had the pleasure of seeing J. Baldessari talk, and he said some things and I thought this is good…

So he starts out as a painter, “I got the sneaking suspicion that there was now more to art than painting…” he burns his paintings in a crematorium, and makes a bronze plaque for himself may 1953-march 1966…and then starts on a new conceptual vain…very cleansing for sure…but a big risk.

BUT here’s where I was really floored… “Fundamentally, to be an artist, you have to make a choice…art is just a series of decisions and choices” then he continued…”what to leave in and take out” and then he showed a series of works where he blanked out books, faces, and a whole bunch of other things…and that editing *FOR* content has been with him since… Katie has told me so many times that artists make decisions…and that’s it…soooooo right, as it doesn’t matter about objects, etc…as long as the decision making process is sound…To him “language gives structural theory”, and text and image are both equal in his mind…

He was saying that Nam Jun Paik, when they taught at Cal Arts together, told him that “what’s interesting in your work is what’s not there”

Also you always say about making good ink drawings, it’s confidence…he said the same thing, and the way he deals with it is pretty simple he states “The point is to make the drawing look better than the piece of paper.”

It’s been a while, 20 days in Italy, mid review…but I’ve got a lot to say…much has been going on, and the majority of it…has to do with school. I wish I was writing more so I could keep track of how my day to day activities influence my life. This is the start again. I can remember I *used* to write every day…back on it

Anyway, I STILL don’t have a job for the summer, and I’m struggling (to put it bluntly) to make rent every month. I feel very qualified for a whole slew of jobs, but I feel at the mercy of those who would hire me. I have been trying to get a part time job at Comp USA for a long time now, and it’s driving me crazy as it’s been a month, and still no word. (except the forms, drug test, etc., etc.)

Art and life are pretty close right now…and I feel like a lot of times that being here at SFAI is not worth it, so I’m investigating my options, as I’m 25,000 in the hole for this year, and tutorials are rediculous…I’ve been blessed in that I feel like I can do anything, but that’s not why I am at school, it’s for the teachers, community, academics, and facilities.

SFAI is so much like a soap opera, that it detracts from the student experience. There are so many worries, about money, and there are so many half truths and lies. So much so (with the driama) that Ella King Torrey hung herself last week…and the school is not saying anything about it (in regards to the suicide) I’ve had to deal with similar things at CU but it’s always acknowledged, so the community can start to heal…This is a dysfunctional family…and the kids are suffering. I’ve never heard a single person, when I ask about school say that they really like it or are having fun. There was a ton of bitching at my last school, but *student experience* was usually positive. Not so here. The ship is sinking here, and I refuse to go down with it.

I’ve been to Stanford, and financially it’s a great option, my portfolio is stronger and it’s close to here so moving costs would be minimal. I’m also considering UH, UT, UCLA, UCSD…I would have to take a year off in all cases, but I think for the 25,000 it will save, as well as the teaching experience it will provide…

I’m not completely discounting SFAI yet…I still have three months to roll it over in my mind.